Blogcism.

This will be a short post.

You only want to highlight how ridiculously stupid it is that you can't post comments on a xanga site.

greel08 this is directed directly at you. (Wait, is that anaphora?)

Ooooh anaphora. We love it.

Touch it bitches. I'm crawling back under my rock. Fuck you.

He who is...

The dp

Be careful when you stroke it...

...you never know when you'll blow out your wrist.

Not that you actually did blow out your wrist. At least not doing that anyway. They can rest safely assured that it still works for that.

Your wrist is a complete fucking mess however and its kind of hard to believe that you "must've slept on it wrong" for a week and a half. So you gave in and bought a wrist support today and have an appointment to see your doctor tomorrow. You have a nagging suspicion that this is either a repetitive stress injury or tendonitis.

UPDATE: It's tendonitis. Your doctor said so.

You're too young for this shit.

But we still love you dp.

The First Week of the Rest of Your Life.

You're watching season one of Magnum P.I. on DVD. Could it get any stranger?

Make firefox your bitch...

In case they have a fast machine, a broadband internet connection and didn't already know:

1. Type about:config into the url bar
2. Set network.http.pipelining and network.http.proxy.pipelining to true.
3. Set network.http.pipelining.maxrequests to something like 30.
4. Create nglayout.initialpaint.delay and set it to 0

That's it. Now firefox is not only the world's best browser but it renders pages like a crackhead running from the police.

If they a) don't know how to change these settings or b) don't know what the hell any of this is about, then they should just ignore this post.

Bobby's a pimp...

Bumbaclot!

Recently on IM...

The funniest IM conversation you've had in a long long time.

Eric: You're gay... I'm going to take a shit
You: fuck off boner
Eric:

Eric sent you a wink which requires the latest version of MSN Messenger. To download the latest version of MSN Messenger, go to http://g.msn.com/5meen_us/122.

You: wtf is a wink? queer.
Eric: 8====>(R)<====8
You: enjoy your shit. im gonna go make hash browns.

You're still laughing.

The Lasts...

What was the last...

Movie you watched?
Pitch Black. Quite underwhelming.
Thing you ate?
Miso soup and rice.
Time you were hung over?
Last Sunday morning. God how you wish that wasn't a standard Question/Answer
T.V. show you watched?
Chapelle's Show. (Thanks StoneGrody!)

When was the last time you...

Wanted to punch G. Dubya?
What time is it?
Were inspired?
It's finals week bitch, you're not familiar with inspiration. Just recitation.
Felt infatuated with something?
Today.
Got your heart broken?
Its hard to get your heart broken when you dont have one to break. Okay that was stupid. Lets see, it was about 3 and a half years ago. Your ex-girlfriend of four years decided that she had had enough of you. That was Christmas eve '02.
Had coffee?
Yesterday evening. About 8 hours ago.
Read a book?
This morning, your Abstract Algebra book.
Had a cigarette?
Half an hour ago.
Had a romantic kiss?
You'll have to ask her and get back to them on that.
Had a crush on someone?
Today. This girl Her Rosiness told you about. She *is* fuckin hot!

Bobby!? Wassup biaaatch!? What you got?

More 5ives...

As seen earlier on...

Top 5ive Female Fetishes

1. Glasses- I don't know, there's just something about that look. Its the studious look, it might have something to do with number...

2. Brains- Come on, this should go without saying, but when I talk to some girl and the conversation consists of me saying something clever and her responding huh? 'Nuff said.

3. Beanies- Handsome knows whats up. So cute. Dood, I love girls in beanies.

4. No Makeup- Not none at all, just not all the time. Its just a thing. I dont have any reason for this. Just my preference.

5. Spunk- I dont know how else to put it. I like it when a girl talks some shit. I mean within reason right? I like a little fire, a little you know...shiaat


Top 5ive Reasons I Always Look Mad
1. I haven't gotten any in 372 days. [as of 1/9/04]

2. I'm broke.

3. Because I'm a bitter cynic fed up with the way thing are.

4. Its an alergic reaction to the disproportional amount of stupidity I find myself surrounded by.

5. Because I dig her but she doesn't dig me.


Ooooh droo5ki, give it to um.

Tag! You're it Bobby.

You're so judgemental...

Note to self:

Stress + You = Pimples

Pimples - Stress = Consumption

So while you're dealing with it all, if you get a chance, please listen to and review these albums for addition to/exclusion from the collection:

The Woods, by Sleater-Kinney

Get Behind Me Satan from The White Stripes

One Word Extinguisher from Prefuse 73

and finally,

Surrounded By Silence, also from Prefuse 73.

Stop buying shit.

That is all. Please return to your previous activities.

dp

Murderball?

Yes.
We must all see this movie.

Kids, when you buy a bootleg DVD...

...you may be supporting people who might sympathize with a terrorist group that hasn't actually attacked us.

What the fuck is that? Come on bitches.